What if You Said How You Truly Feel?


By: Amy Maricle

What if you said how you truly feel instead of hiding, denying, or avoiding your emotions?

I know that saying how you really feel can be scary, but with a little practice, you may find that emotional authenticity has some profound effects in your life.


What does being “authentic” mean?

Living authentically means looking honestly at yourself – your feelings, your needs, and your desires.  Being authentic means:


  • Taking care of yourself by asking for what you need in your relationships.


  • Having the courage to gently (not hurtfully) say things that may seem selfish or petty, but accurately describe how you feel.


  • You don’t periodically “lose it,” because you feel overwhelmed by unspoken feelings or taken advantage of by others.


  • You feel good about yourself because you take care of your physical, emotional, and spiritual needs.


  • Others respect you and your needs because you demonstrate that you respect yourself.


  • You generally have open, honest, and trusting relationships because people know how you feel and that you aren’t playing games.



The old adage says to treat others as you would have them treat you.  I would add: Treat yourself as well as you treat others.


Don’t you deserve caring and respect as much as everyone else? Many of us are good at being good to others, but struggle to be as good to ourselves.


Being a caring, generous, and flexible person are amazing qualities, but they should not be at the expense of your own needs and well-being. The cost of being too focused on everyone else’s feelings and needs is becoming everyone else’s doormat.



What would happen if you said how you really feel?


Do you struggle to say how you really feel? What gets in the way for you?


Tell us about it in the comments section!



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DISCLAIMER: This information is not a substitute for professional psychological advice, diagnosis, or treatment. All content provided by Maricle Counseling and Amy Maricle, LMHC, ATR-BC is intended for general information purposes only. Never disregard professional medical or psychological advice or delay seeking treatment because of something you read here.


  1. Laura Query

    The one I have to work on the most is making sure I’m really expressing everything I need to and in a way that is actually communicating my message respectfully and honestly.

    Feel free to add this badge to the post! 🙂

    a href=”http://www.brenebrown.com/” target=”_blank”>

    • Amy Johnson Maricle

      Hi Laura

      Being honest and kind at the same time while also not watering down your message can be tricky sometimes. I know sometimes when I am saying something delicate that I get too verbose and the point gets lost!

      Being authentic is such a growth process for so many of us!

      Thanks for sharing.




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